Akeem, The African Dream

SPOILER ALERT! PRO WRESTLING ARTICLE! IF YOU CANNOT HANDLE AN ARTICLE ABOUT THE AWESOMENESS OF 80'S WRESTLING THEN FIND AN ARTICLE ABOUT THE DEBT CEILING AND THEN FIST YOURSELF!

I was going to write about the saga of Saba Simba for this article but realized that the article would be about offensive racism and not be funny. Saba Simba was a guy named Tony Atlas that Vince McMahon had a grudge against. When Tony came looking for work he was given a tribal costume and a shield and spear. Tony danced around barefoot. He did not last long.

This article will be about Akeem, the African Dream. Same amount of racism but this storyline was better, more memorable, and funnier. To read on about South Africa's favorite son, just click the little button.

Time Waster: The Wikipedia Game

I used to work a night shift job at a desk. I wasted many hours of work online. Since I could not look at porn, the internet wasn't as vast as it was at home. After a while I had played every internet game I wanted to and read every news article I cared about. I eventually found the need to invent time-wasters for myself. So if you are in a similar position, I would suggest trying my wikipedia-hyperlink game.

Don't Question My Fandom

NFL season has semi-officially started and it's time to act like an irrational, maniac every Sunday. Drinking dangerous amounts of beer and consuming absurd quantities of fried food isn't the only thing that makes your stomach hurt, it's the constant challenge of defending your allegiance to your favorite teams. If you have asshole friends (like I do), then you are familiar with the scenario of cheering for another team that your friends do not support and being chastised for it. Here's how to kick those douchers in the intellectual balls.

Are You A Mexicool?

PRO WRESTLING ALARM! THIS IS A STORY ABOUT PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING!

Do not read this if you do not want to hear about some of the craziest, funniest, and most offensive storylines in cable TV history. Every bit of this story is true and a billion dollar entertainment company that this was a good idea and would make the company money. If you want to read about a trio of Mexican wrestlers portraying landscapers on television, then please click the little button and read on. And did I mention that these are EVIL landscapers?

The Story of Snitsky

SPOILER ALERT: This is a story about Professional Wrestling. If you do not want to read a story about some of the weirdest and funniest things broadcast on cable television then please stop reading.

The story of Gene Snitsky is a strange one indeed. He is an unquestionably large and powerful athlete. Snitsky is ugly and likely has a basement or crawlspace full of bodies. And for a brief period, he made a powerful connection with the audience because his actions led to a miscarriage. Only in wrestling. Find out more after the bump.