In this day and age everyone loves Batman. When growing up, I wanted to be Batman. Now that I'm roughly the same age as Bruce Wayne I still want to be Batman (Or Rocky Balboa depending on the status of Americas relationship with Russia and/or Mr. T). To help quell my desire to become the Caped Crusader I've come up with a list of things Batman can't do in everyday life.
For the sake of this list we are placing Batman, not his alter ego Bruce Wayne, in these situations:
1. Batman cannot enter a bank.
This one seems like it's no real problem. With debit cards, online transactions, and the age of internet banking you rarely need to enter a bank. Yet, think about when you have a banking problem. These problems almost always require face to face discussion because the banks hide behind their computers. As Batman, you're wearing a mask and most banks have a sign up which ask you to remove anything covering your face before entering.
2. Batman can't use a urinal
He has a suit made to resist bullets and withstand blades. I'm sure there's a powerful built-in steel cup anyone fighting Cheick Kongo wishes they had. The point is this, he would have to completely drop trou in order to take a leak. Though it seems exposing his Bat-junk to the world isn't much of an issue to Batman (he had sex in public, with Black Canary, wearing the suit) I doubt he wants to expose the Bat-hole to a restroom full of dudes.
3. The Batmobile is to big for a drive-through
Look how big all three of those cars are. The most "regularly" sized one is from when Adam West wore the cowl. Michael Keatons is small enough to fit in the space, but he's small enough he couldn't reach the window. That damned Joel Schumacher contraption looks more like a Wright brothers failed attempt at flight. What about the Tumbler you ask?
It doesn't even fit on a big rig. This is a photo taken by a friend of mine as it was being hauled across the country for some unknown reason (to fight crime). No way that thing fits the inside lane at McDonald's.
4. Batman can't go swimming for fun
I'm not saying Batman can't swim, I am saying it can't be fun. Water in the Batsuit would likely cause chafing. There is rubber, synthetic materials, it's heavy, it's hot, and it is surely sticky. Swimming would cause you to exert a tone of energy just to stay afloat, and being underwater breathing air out of the Bat-oxygen tank can't be very relaxing.
5. Movie Theaters are not made for Batman
It's bad enough when you get stuck behind a tall person at a movie theater, or someone wearing a big hat, or kids. Imagine being stuck behind someone with bat ears and a cape. Now imagine he has his Batcommunication devices on through the whole movie? It would take a real BatDick to even consider going to a movie theater
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