Football season is over "No More Games. No More Bombs. No More Walking. No More Fun." as the good Doctor wrote in his final passage. With football seasons passing comes the end of the gambling season.
Only the most desperate of gamblers would consider wagering on the archaic sport of baseball. It would take a lost soul with a lust for a negative balance to place bets on college basketball this close to the tournament. So, what is one smitten with quick transfers of cash to do?
Have long-standing wagers with your wife, girlfriend, co-workers, parents, siblings, and neighbors. A seasoned gamblers relationships don't last as long as their bets, so be sure have all bases covered. A long standing bet is one you don't know the immediate outcome of. These are the bets you write on a piece of paper and keep under lock and key for months, even years. You only bring it up in hushed whispers and the paper it is written on doesn't see the light of day until it's time to pay up.
Bet on friends and co-workers relationships, how long they'll be employed, wither or not they'll be fired! Somebody in the office knocked up? Start a board, everyone buys a date for delivery. If the pregnant woman finds out tell her she can't buy in, but 1/3rd of the purse goes toward an "Office present for the baby" roughly translated; a candy bar for the mom, a card, and some small stuffed animal. Total cost $7.50.
More immediate bets can be made on day-to-day life. 3-1 Odds the office drunk comes in sober today. Over/Under 5 layoffs announced at the big meeting. Tim is a +200 dog against that drunk guy with the broken pool cue. 2-1 Aaron gets herpes from the hippy chick leaving his room. Over/Under 3 weeks before Steve finds out I've been nailing his wife.
Making these bets ensures you to have a happy, healthy gambling life during this down time known as "Post-Superbowl Pre-March" then again during "baseball season"
No comments:
Post a Comment