One of my jobs as a blogger and entertainment guru is to educate you to movies and TV shows you have missed. I am the first to admit I have weird tastes. My friends and I have Bad Movie Nights where we watch the worst of the worst. I love bad movies. And this is not one of them. The Best Movie You've Never Seen is...Brotherhood of the Wolf.
First things first, Brotherhood is a French movie. It's also a period film set during the French Revolution. It's also a martial-arts movie with fight scenes that were ahead of its time. It's also a Monster movie. No other film has ever crossed and contained this many sub-genres.
Brotherhood of the Wolf features a French hunter that we have dubbed Triple Benoit because he looks like the child of professional wrestlers Triple H and "Ultimate Scumfuck" Chris Benoit. Triple Benoit and his Iroquois Indian tracker companion Mani have been contracted to hunt a monster that has been killing people up and down the French countryside.
And did I mention that Mani is played by Mark Dacoscos? Mark Dacoscos is a former Martial Arts champion. He also plays The Chairman on Iron Chef America. A man who gets paid to say 10 words and eat amazing food in a French/period/Martial Arts/Monster movie. And the Chairman is the star of the picture. Chairman has several brutal scenes of fighting and using deadly weapons.
There is a monster eating and destroying simple townsfolk. The monster looks like an armored rhino with the claws and jaws of a Sabertooth Tiger.
There is also a secret society in control of the monster and they're dead-set to stop Triple Benoit and the Chairman. The secret society brings in killers and the whole country seems to be in on the conspiracy. More fight scenes. Lots of brutality and some slow motion.
But the scene that is most memorable to film fans involves the ultra-hot Monica Bellucci as a prostitute who wins the heart of Triple Benoit. Not really, but he bangs the shit out of her a couple times. Whilst making love/balling the camera focuses on her bare breasts and the scene dissolves into the French Alps. Her bare-breasted silhouette becomes a beautiful snow-covered mountain chain.
And the movie ends with an awesome fight between the leader of the secret society and Triple Benoit. The leader attacks with a bone sword that quickly becomes a whip with sharp edges. Many points for original weaponry. Good guys win. Bad guys lose. And you want to watch the movie again a week later. It is perfection.
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